kamalagoss interview generator

I have been seeing a pattern in Kamalahassan's public speeches. They tend to be contrived and pseduo-intellectual, focusing more on the fabric of words than meaning. To beat the humdrum, if I am able to generate the code for his speech, I'd at least have the thrill of verifying it against his next speech, instead of succumbing to asphyxia.

Today we have on sets one of the most versatile actors Mr.Kamalagoss, who is celebrating his 55th birthday.

Camera pans to the dough on the table, kept for the next "Samayal Samayal" program.

Kamalagoss: Well..naa inga iruken..idhu verum maavu..aaaaw..aaa..aaaaww

Damil anchor: Oh..hoho..sorry sorry sir..Nan neenga inum Dasavatharam make-up le irukeengalo nu nenchen

Kamalagoss: Avadharam nu solalaam. Elarume avadharam thane?

(Decode: Inviting the unsuspecting listener into a cosmic argument which is a trap for the rest of the onslaught)

Damil anchor: Adhu epdi solreenga? (Ayayyao..paithiyam kelambiruchche...ini pongal veykaama vidaadhe)

Kamalagoss: Naanum carbonlerndhu vandhen..neengalum carbonlerndhu than vareenga. apo naa avadharamna....neengalum saga avadhaaramdhane...

(Decode: Some notion to say that he is above you by actually saying he treats you on par with him. Attempt to prove humility)

Damil Anchor: Okay sir..Neengale solitenga...ipo pudhusa ena muyarchi panreenga?

Kamalagoss: Muyarchi epovume pazhasu than. Nethiku pota viththu than iniku maram. Anniku MMKR le panina muyarchi than inniku panchathanthirathla vara iyar bashay. adhanala muyarchi enikum onnu than.. aniku KB sir neer kumizhi-le pannadha muyarchiya iniku naama panitom?

(Decode: Connect random concepts loosely around a word and show that there is an embedded meaning that only meta-thinker like him can bring out. Add a slice of self deprecating humility to negate the superior air around meta-thinking)

Damil Anchor: mm..correct sir. Ipo namma cinema next level ku ponum na ena pananum nu nenaikireenga

(Decode: Consistent reality distortion hallucinates the anchor and they play into asking open ended life altering questions)

Kamalagoss: Tamil cinema next level ku poganumgradhu enaku ulla veri nu laam sola maten. Venunna oru-thalai kaadhal, mogham nu solalam. Ingha mogham nu sonna enna sex veriyan nu soliruvangha. Oru thalai kadhal nu yen solrenna, naa matum virumbina poradhu..adhu rasiganukku pidikkanum...rasiganum next level ku poganum.

(Decode: Insert a plug on how progressive he is by making a shallow sexual reference and distancing from it graciously belong to the rest of the crowd. Throw in a huge responsibility to unsuspecting audience before they question his fixation to dough based makeups)

Damil Anchor: Neenga cinema-va thaandi pala talangal-le iyangureenga...adha pathi..

Kamalagoss: Naa thuttukku nadikra oru kooththaadi. Anaa koothaye 24 mani neram senja enakku adhu bore adikum ilaya..pondaati kooda car-le pompodhu apdiye oru azhagaana ponnu vandha orakannale pakradhu ilaya..adhu mari oru sabalam than indha kavidhai, scriptwriting ellam. Ana pondati koopta elaathayum potutu yes madam sollitu anga aajar ayruven..bhakthi nu vechukalam...bayam kalandha kaadhal nu vechukalam.

(Decode: Avoid answering a question directly. Use analogies that carry pattimanram-type shallow humor. The only aim of such answers are to showcase talent in colloquial regional slice of life humor, whose need I am still trying to decode)

Damil Anchor: Neenga oscar virudhu vanguveenga nu naangalam aavalodu irukom. adhu indha varsham nadakuma (indha varsham padame edukkale..oruvelai adhukkaaagave kuduththa thaan undu)

Kamalagoss: Oscar enbadhu ennaip poruththa varayil oru iyakku visai. Oru undhudhal..inum vegam..inum veechchu..inum visaalamana nokku..adharkana oru mudhugil thatum nigazhvu thaan oscar. andha visai andha mudhugu thattalgal thamizhanidam irundhu vandhu konda irukiradhu. avvidhaththil naan bhaagyavaan. avargal satru ongi thattinaal oru velai oscar pazham vizhumo ennavo.

(Decode: Jump to sen-thamizh sentences to make the audience feel that he is making an important postulate which is like the universal equation that einstein attempted.Make a remark that such things dont bother him and yet keep it open, to prove that he is not a jerk that despises that what he doesn't deserve)