Saturday, August 06, 2005

When God sees us .....

This post ain't holy...its holy crap...

What would you, me, he and she would be doing when God sees us and no one else?

Most probably

Digging nose and look at the finger tip to see if life has come along with it through nose ...(disgusting?)

Whistling songs with missed notes filled with air....(thankfully normal?)

Checking out the under arms stink index and check again in a split second....(oh not again?)

Watching TV mostly toggling between vernacular and F Tv... (Ho hmm?)

curling in the bed till you think of the next best thing to do(oh yesss?)

Going round in circles till you realize that the circle never ends after it begins(oh, you too?)

Doing some sex act till you get a knock at a door or it ends the most natural way(yeah but eeks?)

Scratching till it pains or bleeds (aaah?)

Correcta da? (Get used to the "a" and "da" after every word. Thats the way a tam speak engleesh)

Will my pyre burn without these?

Just thought of listing out what all have to happen to me, if life has to be fulfilling.....
  1. Become Rich
  2. Start and run my own profitable business as soon as possible
  3. Be a good husband
  4. Be a great Dad
  5. Have good sex, till i feel like
  6. Eat potato curry and curd rice whenever I want
  7. Buy a car before I get married
  8. Act/Compere/Make Ads atleast once
  9. Own a beautiful independent house with greeneries
  10. Show my mom the world, the nice things money and love can get her. Get her all she's missing
  11. Work for a cause, in a capitalist way
  12. Make more money than my friends and still love wearing veshti and retian my old nokia phone
  13. Watch more kamlahassan flicks
  14. More and more of sujatha novels

Shortest Thriller

The last man surviving in the world was at his home. There was a knock at his door !

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Can you excuse me? I want to have a paralytic stroke!

I am no married...I am no stay with Family

But I know a lemon will not cost 10 bucks! May be 2 bucks?

More so I know a teaspoon of sugar wont cost 5 bucks ! May be 50 paise?

A glass of water costs nothing..well may be in chennai, I would put 50 paise. Or may be 25 paise?

Alright, if it's refreshingly cold - I swear the ice was taken from the freezer and not specially ordered from Siberia - I will put 1 Re for it.

So I lime juice can cost Rs. 3.50. I like capitalism. So lets give a profit margin of 50%? No lets take 100%.

So a lime juice should cost Rs.7.

Ok I agree its not just about lime jiuce ...its about the experience of sitting in a leather sofa (but soaked with rava dosa oil and idly crumbs)

Heck ! Take another 3 bucks for it.

Lime Juice - Thou shall not cost more than 10 rupees.

Oh..ah..agg...aaahhhh....ammaaaa...oh..I feel like the the docc...ttt...errrr....

Lime Juice in Chennai costs Rs 17 plus tax of 50 paise.

Which dumb ass will drink it. I did. You would have.They will. I will and you will.

In marketing there is a concept called margin of indifference. Every moth if you see the price of rin soap it will increase (ok, may) by 25 paise or 10 paise...quietly...

You will one day stand up and say - From now on no Rin soap and HLL will fall over its stomach and start crying for its mistakes.

But this never happens and never will....because these are low value stuff and you really dont bother a loss of 1 Re over a year on every Rin soap.
This is called margin of indifference. Marketers will reach this indifference limits and then start decresing price, giving discounts etc..

Now..come to Lime Juice...I will never buy lime juice from Sangeetha again..My margin of indifference is breached.

But you know what...We all will never mind even if it pinches...simple reason..we want to be a victim of capitalism and whine about it..becuase...whining gives a chance to self pity and thats one way of telling yourself that you love yourself

You will tell the story of steep price to 10 people and you all will collectively say "tcho tcho" and that makes you feel good for a flash second.

This is why marketing survives and prices sustain.

Yaarange...Order a lime juice..

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