Change the name, I Say

There are some names that have to be changed, like Rakhi Sawant, Kapil Sibal, A.Raja to something less contrived than what the people behind have lent to the names. But Poschim Bongo? It somehow makes me feel that it means "Pichkaav my bum". With all literariness and poetic juice, all they could do is come up with Pos-rofl-chim bon-haha-go?

Let me suggest a few (only slightly better) names for states/people that want to change the name for the heck of it:

Tamilnadu - Kalthonri-manthonra-munthonriya-mooththakudi-pore (we can't convert Chennai to Singapore. lets at least have a "pore" sounding state)

Andhra Pradesh - Chiranjeevilu-airveenai-dance-bradesulu

Kerala - kovil-barebody-police-ooopisar-thirunal-varma-il

North India - Amit-upon-paan-spitland (like London upon thames. Asingathlayum weightu)

Since there is a newness about 'South Sudan', the 'North Sudan' has to become 'North Noodaan'?. A taliban mulla says they would rename "Pa-kis-tan" to "Pa-No Kiss -tan". After the credit rating fiasco the US of A should consider naming itself "USAAA+". Then on S&P would have no way to take AAA+ rating from the US.

Of course its not all jokes. If there can be something good from a name change, we are all for it (like karai nalladhu). Columbia can do with thelivuya as a new name. New thelivu in that country means no gang wars. But we wont say the same about Syria. They are already crying of civil war that if someone can make them "Siri"ya, it could go a long way in healing. But Sirilanka has to be Verilanka, right?